A little intensive care package here. Red wine.

Red states, blue states.

a blue and a red state,

Mark Twain said irreverence is the champion of liberty, if not its only defender.

So New York wants a comedian as President.

For those of you thinking of getting implants, there's something new to try.

That's from our new book, One Night in Paris.

What's new? He used to do that during my act!

She's right, Tom. As soon as the program starts and we see the candidates' wives in their red suits...

There are no red and blue states, there's only the United States of America. That's what we're about.

Comedian Tom Dobbs has won New Jersey as well as Virginia,

It's gonna be a whole new ball game, so brace yourselves, people.

Do something new for your boyfriend. Put in a little squeaky toy.

When I first saw you, I liked you because you were different, new.

Swedish carmaker Volvo has announced they are replacing air bags in their new sedans

There's a plane there. We'll get on that plane, I'll take you to New York and we'll solve your problem. OK?

of government of the people, by the people, for the people.

Jack, you're the manager of the President of the United States.

I'm tired of the Republican Party and of the Democratic Party.

# I'm tired of the Democratic Party I'm tired of the Republican Party