I once had a blind date that I left in the theater. I felt so bad, I married her.

In the circus you shave them with a blowtorch.

There was a problem with the computer voting system.

- is she applying for a job with you? - No.

- Pump a little iron, you look like a Humvee. - With little tiny balls.

but I'm hoping for a dark walnut with a nice veneer. That'd be lovely.

Delacroy Systems has completed a deal with the European Common Market

A Malaysian man, famous for pulling planes and buses with his hair,

Oh, no. I have a glorious love-hate relationship with TV.

Because I think a woman can be obsessed with a movie star like Brad Pitt - hello! -

- with breast implants. - (laughter)

...with words, then yes,

I'm gonna talk this over with Menken. Come on, I want you with me. Come with me.

but we are very pleased to have a most honored guest with us...

I'm not even President of the United States yet, and I'm involved in a scandal with a woman.

Well, Tina, I have just one question: is this a face that a woman would be obsessed with?

And now, voting with confidence.

and my relationship with the voting public.

- Listen, Eleanor, I'm with the President. - What?

Are you with the ambulance? Eleanor Green?